Thursday, May 11, 2006
My room is so filled with the memories of her. I can hardly fall asleep. Suffering from insomia, I often fall asleep in camp and at some point in time actually sleep in camp off office hour just so that I survive everyday.
Many had asked me why I stayed there when all are eager to book out. As always I got to lie, I claimed I am damn sick or too tired to walk home that is why I sleeping in my bunk. 7 days without much sleep is taking its toil.
Why the sudden missing of her? Actually, all the while I did miss her but often I do not wish to show how much I loved her to others. So I often acted nonchalant and flirt around a lot, go over obsesse with someone else and woo her like a casanova. But none had noticed how much more I had drank until I fell into debts and everything.
But things changes when i watched a couple of hong kong series and realized that to have a soft spot for someone you love is not something to be ashamed of. It might had been the past but if I give up, it will guanranteed to be the past. Everyday I stared at the phone hoping that she will reply me that she agreed to my proposal to celebrate her birthday with her.
After all, the time we get together was three days after her birthday last year. I really hope to surprise her but I guess she will probably get a rude shock instead.
I am totally lost at this point in time, I really hope somoene could give me some guidance.
2:37 AM
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