Monday, June 19, 2006
It seems that what will my girlfriend do if she do not have friends to accompany? If she is really bored and wanted to talk to a guy. Even if I am not free, I will say "Do not meet him. Come to me. I will quit working now." That is true love. Love is to abandon what you doing now to see her.
I may say that now, but last time I never do that. I always think she is too childish she will probably demand me to see her now instead of saying, "Dear, I know you have important things to do, finish it then call me k?" But that was what she always do in silent, I never seems to notice because maybe like what she say I still treat her like a little girl. I gave her the protection, the care and concern like one would give to a helpless girl.
I dote so much on her, I protect her so much. Why? Simply because I do not want to walk this life without her or her being hurt. I plan for the perfect future, her favourite dog. The house she always wanted and the very wedding she look forward to. I think hard everyday how to get the money to put fireworks in the wedding? I even consider turning to be a diplomat to gain access to such privilages. The house will probably cost more like 10 to 15 million dollars in singapore, i think about the option I have. I even consider doing dangerous jobs such as repairing oil tankers and such, that will still take me more than 7 years to accumulate that much.
I wanted the best for her so much so that I totally ignore her. I really regret planning so much, for in the end I lost her and all the plans are in my rubbish bin. I always pretended to say I am busy with work and such so I can secretly plan all this. Save up on rings and such, when we broke up I splurge all on food and things. I cannot even remember what I bought.
If instead of scrim and save everyday, I spend a little on her everyday. Maybe we could still be together. Maybe if I had gave her a rose everyday, I would not need to apologize with a dozen of rose which only see the dust bin.
I miss her nagging.
9:16 PM
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